If hatred smolders within us as a distortion, its embodiment manifests itself first of all through judgment, and then, most of the time, through slander – that is, through badmouthing.
Listen to a word on this topic where we try to give you the causes, examples and methods of healing.
Enjoy!
Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, now and forever, and unto the ages of ages. Amen. Through the prayers of our Holy Fathers, Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us. Amen.
We talked last time about hatred and remembering evil, and so talking about slander and judgment is next. Unfortunately, today, the topic of slander is a very thorny one – there are even professions that deal with it – for example, part of the press deals with exactly that. Let me give you an example that is characteristic of Greece. There was a bishop with a very, very holy life here in Greece, I can say his name because he went to the Lord – Iakovos of Argolis. He made great efforts to build an orphanage, if I remember correctly, or a hospital. I think it was an orphanage though. Or a nursing home. In any case, it was a large charitable institution and it was equipped with the most modern equipment, with sisters, done very well.
The man fought a lot for this institution which I don’t remember exactly what it was. But I remember that after all this effort that lasted for years, he went to the press and said – “Folks, come see that I made this orphanage, let’s promote it!…” And the one he went to said, “Yes, yes, okay, we’ll see.” He went to others, “I am wondering whether we can promote this…?” They said, “Okay, okay, we’ll see later on.” He went to a third and so on, until at one point some reporters rushed His Eminence and said to him, “Sir, did you steal, did you fornicate or things like that? These are of interest to us. We’re not interested in your orphanage or the charitable institutions you’ve set up.” Understand?
Unfortunately, people, therefore also the press, are more interested in scandal, in slander. Brethren, it’s not good. We must be interested in the good example. Understand? You can see that usually the negative example is promoted in the press. From this we see the morbid desire to defame, to minimize love, to minimize peace in the world because the promotion of sin is sought, that is, the distortion of love. Understand? Christ is the source of love, brethren, and today the world is far from Christ, hence from love. That’s why we have the institutional and large-scale practice of slander – people slander each other, political parties slander each other, governments and states slander each other.
Society is very polarized, and there is no longer any concern in protecting the person or, especially, directly related to the person, in protecting love, the connection with God. We must always be attentive to our connection with God and with others. Everything we do should be done to increase our connection with God and to increase love in ourselves and others. You should know that he who loves God cannot fail to love all people as himself, even if he loathes their passions and rejoices with great joy, unspeakable joy, at their return, as the father rejoices at the return of the prodigal son, as St. Maximus the Confessor and Abba Dorotheos said. You see that the saint, the spiritual person sees sin, he is not naive, but this love and enlightenment of the mind causes him to distinguish between sin and the sinner and not to judge him, not to label the sinner, not to condemn him because he is waiting for his return. Understand?
Brethren, it is a phenomenon similar to the situation where we have a bodily illness. We’ve talked about this before. If someone is physically ill, we not only look at him with compassion, but even take care of him, we are lenient with him, take care of him and all the necessary things related to this matter. Understand? It’s the same with the illness of the soul, brethren, do you understand? The person must be cared for and understood, being patient with him, even if sometimes his passions scratch our passions. That’s our problem, not his – God will judge him, do you understand? Since something hurts us, it means we have a wound there.
On this criterion of love and compassion for the fallen regarding spiritual illness, in the Church and in the Holy Scripture, although there are falls presented, negative examples, they are not presented with a spirit of hatred towards persons, but towards sin, because sin, the deed, must be judged, so that we know how to guard ourselves. Brethren, things, therefore, must be presented with discernment at all times in order to draw closer to God. That’s why we present things, do you understand? If not, we hide them. Slander, judgment, condemnation, revilement, are measured by the hateful intent of the one who says it.
Speaking of Scripture since we are reminded of it, you see that in the episode in which the Savior heals the man born blind, the man is asked repeatedly by the Pharisees who healed him. And he, after several answers in which he confesses the Lord, finally answers the Pharisees without fear: “Why do you want to hear it again? Do you also want to become His disciples?” And then they respond with hatred, with anger, and St. John the Theologian who recounts the episode notes that “they reviled him” – yes? – when they said “You are His disciple, but we are Moses’ disciples.” Understand? I mean, they spoke hatefully to him. Attacking. Even if being a disciple of Christ is the highest honor, the intention of the Pharisees was one of hatred, attack, war against the blind man healed by the Lord. So revilement.
Returning, if we mention deeds, it is best not to mention the names of persons, unless these persons are indeed a danger to the flock of the Church and can lead the flock astray – and in general it is better to ask our conscience, “Does God want this?” Also, let’s look at ourselves, saying, “Am I at peace? Am I doing it out of hatred?” Understand? It is usually said – of Hitler or of someone who greatly deceives a lot of people on account of his position or on account of the halo that surrounds him then – it is only said if the man in question is able to lead people astray. Arius, for example, or Luther or others.
We say that he did not do good, but that does not mean that we hate him, but his teaching, his deeds. In general, it is good not to look at what others are doing and not to investigate how and why they are doing it. Our own objective is the purification of the soul and the perfect submission of the mind to divine grace. So, brethren, you mind yourself: pray, study, humbly say the Jesus prayer, know that you absolutely need God’s mercy and leave others because we will only be troubled. If we find out something unpleasant about someone – a mistake, a sin, let’s tell the truth to ourselves. The truth is that if someone has done something wrong, it’s the fault of the devil who whispered to him and not his [fault].
Let me tell you a case: there is a father in Karyes, whom I love very much, I will not say his name because he is still living. He has a small shop that sells prayer ropes, crosses, etc. At one point, thieves broke into his store and stole, they left him – especially since he did not have much – they left him dirt-poor. The police came, went to him and said:
“Father So-and-so (I won’t say his name) tell us who you think stole from here because we will catch them, do not worry because they will not get away!”
Father said: “If I tell you who it was, will you catch him?”
And the cops said: “Yes, Father, don’t worry, we’ll get him for sure.”
“Are you sure?”
“Sure!”
“It was the devil because it was he who put them up to stealing from me! Get him if you can!”
And the father did not want to say [who it was]. He had his suspicions, but did not want to say. Understand? We must as much as possible not slander. Although in the case of theft of course, it must be said. Now, in the Holy Mountain there are other measures. Understand? What can I say…
Sometimes it is not good to judge at all either for good or for bad because we really do not know how things will unfold. You see, now there’s war – for example, someone can judge what will happen if the Russians take Odessa and the Americans will poke the stick through the fence from Romania to provoke them, possibly pushing us into a war that is not ours and so on. Brethren, if we think like this, we will be troubled, we lose all peace. We must not be troubled, but be calm and pray, because there is nothing we can do. Of course, if necessary and the opportunity arises then to act civically – by vote or by other means, or whoever is put in a position [act] with full responsibility.
Our mind, as I said, should be on the love of Christ and nation, and let’s not get lost in countless labyrinths and super-analyses and not be able to sleep at night, unless, of course, God has validated us to deal with these things. Brethren, if God validates us in such positions to judge, then He will also give us the necessary support. That is, access to the necessary information, the necessary counselors, experience and all the rest AND, above all, God will give us the enlightenment and necessary balance to be able to judge the situation with peace, good sense and enlightenment.
Brethren, if we deal with slander, with evil, then evil grows within us. Its demonic energy, the lack of love, drains us and makes us very aggressive. St. John Chrysostom says that it is better to eat the flesh of your brother than to judge him. If, however, we deal with the good, then you should know that the good grows, and we will bloom under its grace. You should know that man cannot become what he does not have before his eyes.
After the fall, man is a victim of influences, what he sees and what he hears and so on and because of this we must always have good examples in front of us and be good examples ourselves! You see, this is why good examples are promoted in the Church, the saints that is, as well as spiritual people. They get promoted so much. Understand? The services that we do for the saints are not because they need them, but because we need them, need their example as a guiding light. The good example is capital, the good thought, but, you know, here too a problem may arise. Here too the problem of judgment may arise, even if it is positive judgment, so to speak – not to say good judgment. That is, let us not get into fanaticism, let’s not consider someone higher than he is, as Holy Apostle Paul said. It is true that the Holy Fathers say we should consider all to be saints and not see their shortcomings, but we should do this out of love for others and not out of naivety or self-love.
Now perhaps it is good to explain how we can reach fanaticism from self-love. In fact, it’s simple, self-love leads us to extremes: a very high trust in our opinions, in our judgments, trust that leads to fanaticism both towards us and towards the one we approve of inside us, and the other extreme that arises is the very high uncertainty beyond the very high trust – because in fact this trust is based on nothing. At one point, the person sees that he is very certain of his opinion, and sees that this opinion is shaken and then the uncertainty is very high and then, the man holds on to his opinion for dear life. Understand?
This very great uncertainty is seen at the moment when our judgments waver in the light of truth, and then, because we love ourselves, we firmly hold on to our position, especially if this position is expressed publicly. Understand? Brethren, let us not cling to our own mistakes or to the mistakes of others because we are the same. I’ve said this.
Do not think that this is how we do the good, if we publicly expose, indiscriminately, the mistakes of others. We should then say our own, and these we do not say. If we publicly expose them indiscriminately, we increase division, war. A bad deed is only revealed when it represents a head-on danger to a community. However, it’s paradoxical that today the great sins of the greats are hidden in front of communities and others are revealed – which destroy love. And even if we learn such things, let us not be troubled, but let us not forget that Judas was in the band of the disciples, among the 12 Apostles, of the same honor with them, and the thief [on the cross] in the band of murderers, and in an instant the positions changed. From this it can be seen how fleeting, how ephemeral is the judgment of people here on earth.
You see, brethren, Christ Himself did not judge people here on earth. He could have said, “You’re lost!”, “You’re finished!”, “You don’t have a chance!”, “You’re done!” and others like this, “You are going to hell!” Christ did not separate people, and He did not separate Himself from people, He did not war against them by the judgment which He applied to them. Because He could have, He was God and is.
On the contrary, He even called Himself the “Son of Man,” as a joy and crown of his humility. Understand? Christ delimited Himself only from sin. Judgments are forms of warfare, brethren. Brethren, we must be united, more than ever. See what’s going on in the world! Let us be strong in faith and not submit to the forces that want to destroy love, to destroy the unity between us, and which seek to promote evil, the laceration between us. Know that there are serious forms of this phenomenon, especially if the target is the frail ones, the weak ones.
For example, something trivial that I hope you will not witness, but… If someone comes to the church, a newcomer, a catechumen, and the person does not know how to behave, does not know what to do; Brothers and especially sisters, let’s not judge him and – worse – verbally assault him, let’s not throw him out. Understand? Another example – unfortunately – happens in school, university, and not only, where the judgment takes very ugly aspects in the form of bullying, revilement. It’s not good!
Of course, all of us who judge others forget that with what judgment we judge, we will be judged, brethren. No one escapes God’s judgment. God is not mocked. In heaven it is not like here on earth where you can get away with it and it doesn’t catch you. The torments of conscience are eternal, brethren. That’s what we should be afraid of, afraid of being judged by our conscience and God, and not by how people see us. Understand?
When someone comes to slander, to judge others, our neighbor, we should not be afraid of him, and say “Brother, stop it! I do much worse things than him every day. How can I condemn him for being better than me?” Understand? This is how we will gain two things: with one cure we heal ourselves and our neighbor. We must not be afraid and panic if someone nonchalantly, callously promotes sin, the judgment of others. Of course it takes discernment and not to pour gas on the fire, but if God opens up the opportunity for us, then we will speak without fear. It is not fear that must stop us – that is, “I am afraid” – but the discernment of love, of peace. If I am afraid, it is afraid not to hurt the other, not to argue with the other. Then yes. Understand?
I unfortunately, or fortunately even, have experiences on this topic, because enough people come who are very sure of their ideas and talk continuously… I try to stop them… and in the end they ask me: “Is that right, father?” They talk to themselves, they answer themselves and in the end they go home and say, “Yes, the father told me.” No. I didn’t tell them. They should not put words in my mouth, understand? Then it must be said, “Please forgive me, it is not so. It’s different,” and I give my opinion. Understand? This is very important. It must always be done peacefully and we do not raise our voice and so on. Yes?
What is characteristic in such situations, first of all, is the very limited and therefore false character of these judgments, because let’s not forget, brethren, that man is a whole microcosm in constant change and therefore impossible to judge with our weak mind. Where do you put the fact that we rely a lot on suspicions – on “I thought…” on “It seemed…” This happens more often in communication where body language disappears, in communication through messages – on WhatsApp, Telegram and the like. If we are not careful and we do not put emojis or we are not very explicit in what we want to express then we may have opposite results and we may be judged or judge. Here the devil, who gives thoughts and prepares “proofs” also helps a lot. For example, if someone is jealous and sees their partner smiling and talking to a third person of the opposite sex, judgment immediately arises. And if when he approaches the enemy makes the two who are being watched stop, then you’ll see! “Aha! They are discussing something secret! They were talking about me! I know! I have documents! Evidence!” And then prove you’re not an elephant… Understand? God forbid!
Let me give you a case. A man goes to St. Paisios and he makes the pilgrim quit smoking. At the end of the meeting, the pilgrim firmly puts the pack of cigarettes on the table and says, “Father Paisios, I will no longer smoke from today!” and leaves. After that another comes in and opens his eyes wide and looks at St. Paisios in horror and says,
“Father Paisios, I heard a lot about you, but I didn’t think you smoked.” And leaves. Well, St. Paisios, saddened, what could he do… and a third one enters, a child, and says to the saint:
“God bless!”
“God bless!”
“Where is Father Paisios?” Because he didn’t know what he looked like.
And the Saint said to him:
“Dear one, he went to buy cigarettes.”
And the child says:
“Oh, yeah? It doesn’t matter, I heard that he is a very good man, he will fight this passion and he will win. There is no problem, the Mother of God forgives him.”
“She won’t forgive him, for he is a great sinner,” said St. Paisios.
“Yes, the Mother of God will forgive him, we will pray to the Mother of God and I will also ask St. Paisios.”
And in time, a discussion is born between that child and St. Paisios in which the saint reproached himself, condemned himself and the child always had a good thought. Understand? Whoever has a good thought, whoever does not slander, whoever does not judge reaches very well, very high. God validates it, and God has validated that child. He is the Metropolitan of Crete, at this hour, you know. His Eminence Irineos.
Speaking of judgement and slander and the Holy Mountain, let me tell you another case that I have already told, but it does not matter, it is good to learn. There was a monk talking to a worker and a policeman in the Holy Mountain – because the Holy Mountain is another state, not independent from the Greek state, but it is a separate state, there are police in the Holy Mountain. And they were talking… And at some point a person runs past them, which is very rare in the Holy Mountain – of course there is no running here. And then the father sees him and says:
“Ah, I have to go to Vespers, it is Vespers time, please forgive me!” And leaves.
And the worker sees him: “Oh, if I were his age, I’d run too.”
Then the policeman says: “Well, this guy stole something, I have to hunt him down, he’s a possible thief!”
Understand? Each one judged him by what he had inside of him. Yes…
Another characteristic is that judges, controllers and counters do not deal with themselves, but with the sins of others. Here we have a double destruction. On the one hand, they do not deal with themselves, as I said, and this condemns them to not healing from their problems that grow over time, until they harden and become chronic, and then it is very difficult to break, to heal. On the other hand, in judging others I place myself above them – that is, I close myself off in hatred, within the very narrow limits of the vision of my own egotism, and I get stuck there because I consider myself above, better than others, because I see only the bad in others. Understand?
Let’s remember that bees only see the good, only flowers and nectar while wasps only go to the filth. Judgment is a very impure habit, brethren, and by slander we pass on that impurity. In fact, brethren, know that the fast from judgment, that is, not to judge others, is much more acceptable before God than the fast from food, even though sometimes it is much more difficult to complete. It is more important to fast from judgment than from food, as the soul is more important than the body, brothers, you should know. That, of course, does not mean to indulge in hearty meals with non-fasting foods in fasting periods. It means refraining from judging! Understand?
So, brothers, we must not judge anyone, but we must love everyone with realism, discernment, and especially with the awareness of our relativity and our judgments, with the awareness that we cannot judge persons, but only facts, and those only partially. That is, we must have the awareness of our humility, brethren.
So help us God! Thank you very much for watching until now. Through the prayers of our Holy Fathers, Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us. Amen.
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